Well it was inevitable that cyber bullying would reach the ranks of military spouses and there is quite a variety of military spouse bullying out there mostly on Facebook. Most military spouses are tough and resilient and take an instance of cyber bullying and let it roll off our shoulders even though our feelings maybe hurt. For some these attacks can come at a moment of weakness when they are at a low point dealing with loneliness and depression. Sadly, we recently lost one of our military spouse sisters to suicide and it is thought that cyber bullying may have played a role.

In reading about this story, I read many articles and the comments as well. One really resonated with me as a young spouse described her experience with cyber bullying. Her husband was deployed, and other spouses had created a Facebook group and made up rumors about her and her husband. They also judged her on her appearance and weight. Unbeknownst to these cruel cyberbullies she was beginning to suffer from depression and almost took her life because of their comments. Luckily, she was able to seek treatment.

Types of Military Spouse Cyber bullying – Here are some of the common types of military spouse cyber bullying found on Facebook:

Making fun of Dependent Status – This type is usually single active duty service members or disgruntled ex-husbands who rant and rave about how military spouses are entitled, haven’t served and are freeloaders.

Rumors – This one is particularly heinous and can often affect the unit as well. People spread rumors that a spouse is having an affair, or a group of spouses are out partying all the time. This one is not new, my mother experienced this during the Vietnam time frame. The husbands were deployed, and a group of wives decided to go to dinner at the Officers’ Club for dinner. Next thing you know it made to the unit and everyone was up in arms not knowing what was going on as of course the rumor became this group was partying and hanging out with other men, not their husbands. Rumors like this can take the focus off the mission.

Just plain mean – This is the bullying where photos are taken and posted online to ridicule a spouse on her looks, how she is dressed or her weight. It also can be directed to someone who asks a question on Facebook and mocking their question or others responses.

What Can You Do to Prevent Military Spouse Cyber bullying or Other Forms of Bullying?

Call it Out. Bullies will often say things on Facebook they would never say in person. This can be an intimidating thing to do as it can often result in that bullying coming down on you. There are ways to be more subtle about this. Report online bullying to Facebook and enlist your friends to report as well. I rarely get told any rumors anymore because I have a reputation of not tolerating it. It is amazing how not saying anything and giving someone a look as they gleefully share a negative rumor can shut them down in their tracks. I also like to ask them who told you that and how do you know this is true? It forces someone to realizes they are spreading rumors and gossiping. Another response, a look of surprise and the comment. “Wow, that’s mean.” You can also make comments online but be careful you don’t get sucked into a bunch of negativity.

Be Positive. Make your comments on Facebook groups and pages encouraging and upbeat. It you can show military spouses in a positive light do so. You can write a blog post or make social media posts highlighting cool things military spouses are doing. This is an effective way to deal with trolls that make fun of military spouse dependent status.

Report to the Chain of Command – Really think this one through and only do it if the situation warrants it. Bringing bad behavior to light goes a long way towards stopping it.

Mental Health

Military Spouses who are suffering from mental health issues such as depression are extremely vulnerable to cyber bullying attacks. When visiting and participating on Facebook pages and groups pay attention to signs someone may feel left out or hurt by comments directed towards them. Reach out if you feel comfortable by private message and ask how they are doing. Maybe suggest a resource if you sense something is amiss.

Here are a few resources:

• Military One Source Military One Source has a confidential 24/7 hotline
• Tricare Crisis Hotlines A variety of hotlines for those seeking mental health help
• Suicide Prevention Hotline The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a national network of local crisis centers that provides free and confidential emotional support to people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. 

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.WanderWordsWine.com

As military families we face so many challenges when we move, new schools, new dentists, who is going to do my hair among other things. Another difficult thing is when you found that great fitness instructor you love who really motivates you and is helping you to reach you goals and you must leave it all behind when you move. What if you could take her with you or access her classes at your next move?

Well military spouse Jamie Carbaugh, CPT PTA, Live Streaming Personal Trainer and Group Fitness Instructor has found a solution by offering virtual personal training. Like many military spouses she struggled to find a job with each PCS. “Being a military spouse and moving constantly has its complications in the job market. I was having to wait months to find a job let alone actually starting one, only to move a couple months later. At our duty stations, I grew three fitness communities around the classes that I taught, only to leave them 2-3 years later and start from scratch again,” she said.

Carbaugh was finding the process frustrating when a dear friend reached out asking if she would be willing to train her virtually. “She noted that I was the only person she wanted to go on this journey with. That was the spark that I needed to take action and my client base has only grown from there,” she said. 

Growing up as an athlete, Carbaugh was fascinated by the body and its extraordinary capabilities. “I received my BS in Human Physiology in 2009, became a certified personal trainer and group fitness instructor in 2010 and was licensed as a physical therapist assistant in 2015. My first group class grew to 70+ folks and when I realized the power that community could play within a fitness environment, I was hooked,” she said.

As her virtual fitness clientele has grown, she has found it is a good fit for her military spouse clients and for herself as well. “Finding someone that you click with as a civilian is tough, now throw moving every 2-3 years into the mix and it makes it twice as difficult. I believe that finding a group fitness instructor or personal trainer that is able to move with you is a piece that you can count on, which feels secure. It’s a piece that you can somewhat ‘control’ in a life where it sometimes seems like, so little is in our control,” said Carbaugh. “From a professional standpoint, I love that I am building something that can move with me and that I can do from most anywhere.” 

Carbaugh is often asked which she prefers more, in person training or virtual. “To be frank, I thoroughly enjoy the mix of the two. A couple of my favorite things about virtual training is the connection I get to make with the individual. Being a part of the fitness industry for so long, it’s my experience that training our physical aspects is never apart from the mental and emotional aspects of us,” she said. “I love being able to get real with the client, meet them in a hotel, basement, garage or their workspace. I feel the virtual setting allows for a chance to open up about things beyond fitness, things that I wouldn’t be able to dive into if we were training in the middle of a crowded gym setting and also that I don’t have to wear deodorant because they can’t smell me (ha!).”

For more information on Jamie Carbaugh or if you have questions about starting your own virtual fitness business, she can be reached via her website or social media.

In laughter & movement

JAMIE CARBAUGH  

fitragamuffin, Live Streaming Personal Trainer

Website: fitragamuffin.com
Instagram: @fitragamuffin
Facebook: fitragamuffin

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.WanderWordsWine.com

As rapid response units have deployed, and more stand ready in the wings, many families are facing a deployment reality that has become uncommon in the last few years. These troops are being sent to the front without their smart devices. Leaving families to rediscover fun ways to connect without tech.

Ways to Connect Without Tech: Old Fashioned Care Package and Letter Ideas

Even just as recently as the start of the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan, many military families exclusively relied on the time-honored traditions of letters and care packages to stay connected during deployments. As technology has developed over the last 20 years, more forward-deployed troops have been able to access the internet, social media platforms or even bring their smart devices with them.

This meant that families no long had to wait for a patchy satellite phone call to come through as their only means of communication in weeks. Instead, emails can be sent or video chats can be started at the drop of a hat. Or, you know, as the mission, internet connectivity and time differences allow.

But with some recently deployed units being told to leave all tech at home, many families will need to dust off their old standbys for connection and communication. Do you remember how to write a meaningful letter or stuff a care package?

Write Letters They’ll Remember

It’s time to recall everything your middle school teachers told you about writing letters. Except this time, make them more personal and, well, loving!

If your loved one is deployed without regular internet access or mail service, Jo, My Gosh recommends making a bunch of “open when” letters.

These are essentially letters that you ship off with your spouse or loved one, packed into their seabag or backpack. Each letter is labeled with a time or situation for them to open that one letter. Things like:

• you feel sore
• you wish you could watch the big game
• you feel hopeless
• you miss me
• you had a great day

Each themed letter should include encouragement about that particular situation. Jo also recommends including a small gift, like a picture of you together or a pain relief patch, with the letters.

This option works great for troops deployed on ships or in combat zones. You could send some letters with your loved one now, and then plan a second (or third) wave of open when letters in a few weeks.

If you will have semi-regular mail services, you can write more often and talk about current events! Share news from your life, what your kids (or pets) are doing and other points of interest.

ArmyWife 101 writer Jackie Toops shared a poignant draft of her first letter to her newly deployed spouse, circa 2017. In it, she writes about how much she misses him and how things have changed on the home front since he shipped out. While she was sentimental, she was also upbeat and positive.

You’ll need to develop your own style for writing letters to your deployed spouse or loved one. Keep things real while also boosting morale. It’s a delicate balance to achieve, but you can do it!

Send Valuable Care Packages

It’s super tempting to load your spouse or loved one up with all the things, via care package. But it’s also important to have a reality check about what they truly need, things that might be nice to have and items that should 100% be saved for homecoming. Veterans United has a great guide that breaks everything down quickly and easily.

So, on the list of items to keep for later:

• risque photos of yourself (or someone else) because those packages might be searched en route
• drugs or alcohol
• pork products (in some observant Muslim countries or locations)
• perishables
• valuables like jewelry, cash or technology
• weapons, including guns
• aerosols or pressurized products

Things that are nice to have, but maybe not always needed could include:

• candy and other snacks
• leisure activities, like decks of cards or travel-sized board games
• books or magazines
• word games, like crosswords
• easy-to-pack sports equipment, like a baseball and glove

Consider packing these items more often:

• deodorant
• baby powder
• topical pain ointment
• lotion
• sunscreen
• high-protein snacks
• water flavor packets
• soap
• baby wipes
• socks
• hand sanitizer
• tampons and pads

Of course, not every service member wants or needs the same things. Try to tailor your care packages to what your spouse or loved one needs and/or enjoys.

Rachel at Countdowns & Cupcakes has hundreds of ideas for themed care packages to make year-round! From branch-specific ideas to coffee themes or celebrating the holidays, she has a care package for every occasion and then some!

Make Sure You Send Letters & Packages Securely

When you’re sending mail to troops deployed overseas, it’s important to know the rules about how to send all the things.

First, make sure you get their forward-deployed address. It’s usually their name, including rank, then a line that substitutes for the street address. Following that is FPO, APO or DPO plus their region code. Right now, that region code is probably AE (Middle East) or AP (Asia-Pacific). There will also be a 5 to 9 digit zip code.

Label the envelope or package as normal:

1. Name
2. “Street” address – it’s the second part of the address your loved one shares
3. FPO/APO/DPO, AP “Zip Code” – that’s the 5-9 digit code that comes last

If you are sending a letter, stick a stamp on there and you’re done! Sending mail to APO/FPO/DPO addresses costs the same as sending something from MA to CA.

It’s wise to stock up on forever stamps in advance, that way you can write letters whenever and just drop them in the mail without a trip to the post office.

For packages, the rules are a little different. You’re going to need a customs form. There are two kinds:

• long
• short

The long form is, well, longer. It’s larger and you’ll need to share more info about what’s in the package, who it’s going to, etc. The short form requires just the basics: a brief description of contents, a general estimate of value, and who it’s going to as well as coming from.

Every single package needs this form. Yes, even if you are sending multiple packages to the same address on the same day. Every single individual package gets a customs form.

When packing your care packages, you’ll want to be careful. The best advice: use lots of tape to really secure everything. Cover every edge, corner and seam with 1-2 layers of packing tape.

Pack delicate or fragile things inside of cushioning, like socks, to prevent breakage.

Try to avoid shipping liquids, but if you must, it’s best to seal them inside of plastic bags to prevent leaks.

Strong smelling items should not be placed with food. Your beef jerky won’t be as delicious if it smells like laundry powder or icy-hot cream.

What are your best tips to make letters and care packages to deployed troops valuable or special? Sound off in the comments!

Take in the sounds of freedom in 2020 with a thrilling air show by the USAF Thunderbirds and US Navy Blue Angels. These legendary flying units have shows across the US and around the world this year. Check out the schedule to figure out the best location(s) for your fun flightline experience!

Take Flight with 2020 Military Air Show Schedule

In 2020, the Blue Angels are flying in 29 air shows or events between March and October. The Thunderbirds will be doing about 35 flyovers, events or shows this year. With all these shows, you’re sure to find at least one coming to an air field near you!

Blue Angels 2020 Schedule

The Blue Angels start flying in March and keep soaring through October. Check them out at one of these locations:

• March 14: NAF El Centro Air Show
• March 21-22: Lancaster, CA – LA County Air Show
• March 28-29: MacDill AFB Air Fest
• April 4-5: NAS Kingsville, TX – Wings Over South Texas Air Show
• April 18-19: JB Charleston Air and Space Expo
• April 25-26: Vero Beach, FL Air Show
• May 2-3: MCAS Cherry Point Air Show and Open House
• May 9-10: Dyess AFB Big Country Air and Space Expo
• May 16-17: McGuire AFB – Power in the Pine Air Show and Open House
• May 20: Annapolis, MD – US Naval Academy Air Show
• May 23-24: Jones Beach, NY – Jones Beach Air Show
• May 30-31: Scott AFB Air and Space Show
• June 13-14: Eau Claire, WI – Chippewa Valley Air Show
• June 20-21: Millington, TN – Memphis Air Show
• June 27-28: Dayon, OH – Dayton Air Show
• July 4-5: Traverse City, MI – National Cherry Festival Air Show
• July 11: Pensacola Beach, FL – Pensacola Beach Air Show
• July 18-19: Cold Lake, Alberta, Canada – Wing Cold Lake Air Show
• July 25-26: Milwaukee, WI – Milwaukee Air Show
• August 1-2: Seattle, WA – Boeing SeaFair Air Show
• August 15-16: Brunswick, ME – Great State of Maine Air Show
• August 29-30: Ypsilanti, MI – Thunder Over Michigan
• September 5-6: Cleveland, OH – Cleveland National Air Show
• September 12-13: Baltimore, MD – Maryland Fleet Week and Air Show Baltimore
• September 19-20: NAS Oceana Air Show
• September 26-27: MCAS Miramar Air Show
• October 3-4: NAS Point Mugu – Naval Base Ventura County Air Show
• October 10-11: San Francisco, CA – San Francisco Fleet Week
• October 16-17: Pensacola, FL – Blue Angels Homecoming Show

If you can’t catch one of these shows, swing by Pensacola, FL in between formal air show to see a practice session!

Thunderbirds Air Show 2020 Schedule

Prepare for takeoff with the Thunderbirds first 2020 show in February and carry on through mid-November.

Schedule out your Thunderbirds shows now:

• February 16: Daytona 500, Daytona Beach, Florida (Flyover)
• Mar 14: Laughlin AFB, Texas – Fiesta Of Flight
• Mar 21-22: Luke AFB, Arizona – Luke Days Air and Space Expo
• Mar 28-29: March ARB, Calif. – March Field Air and Space Expo: Thunder Over the Empire
• April 4-5: Lakeland, Florida – Sun-N-Fun Fly-In & Expo
• April 18-19: Maxwell AFB, Alabama – Beyond the Horizon Air & Space Show
• April 25-26: Columbus AFB, Mississippi – Wings Over Columbus
• May 2-3: Fort Lauderdale, Florida – Fort Lauderdale Air Show
• May 9-10: Beale AFB, Calif. – Wings Over Recce Town, USA”
• May 16-17: Shaw AFB, South Carolina – Shaw Air and Space Expo
• May 23-24: Miami Beach, Florida – Miami Beach Air & Sea Show
• May 28: Colorado Springs, Colorado – USAFA Graduation Fly Over
• June 6-7: Salinas, Calif. – California International Airshow
• June 13-14: Ocean City, Maryland – OC Air Show
• June 27-28: Hill AFB, Utah – Warriors Over Wasatch Air & Space Show
• July 4-5: Battle Creek, Michigan – Battle Creek Field of Flight Air Show and Balloon Festival
• July 11-12: JB Elmendorf-Richardson, Alaska – Arctic Thunder Open House
• July 18-19: Duluth, Minnesota – Duluth Air & Aviation Expo
• July 22: F.E Warren AFB, Wyoming  – Cheyenne Frontier Days
• July 25-26: Ellsworth AFB, South Dakota – Ellsworth Air & Space Show
• August 1-2: Grand Forks AFB, North Dakota – Grand Forks AFB Air Show
• August 15-16: Chicago, Illinois – Chicago Air & Water Show
• August 22-23: Avoca, PA – Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Armed Forces Airshow
• August 26: Atlantic City, New Jersey – Atlantic City Thunder Over The Boardwalk Airshow
• August 29-30: New Windsor, New York – New York Air Show
• September 5-6: Gardner, Kansas – KC Air Show 2020
• September 12-13: London (Ontario), Canada – Airshow London
• September 19-20: Huntington Beach, Calif. – Pacific Airshow
• October 3-4: Minden, Nevada – Aviation Roundup Airshow
• October 10-11: Edwards AFB, Calif. – Aerospace Valley Air & Space Show
• October 17-18: Fort Worth, Texas – Bell Fort Worth Alliance Air Show
• October 24-25: Rome, Georgia – Wings Over North Georgia
• October 31-November 1: Sanford, Florida  – Central Florida Air and Space Show
• November 7-8: New Orleans, Louisiana – “NASJRB New Orleans Air Show”
• November 14-15: San Antonio, Texas – 2020 JBSA Air & Space Show & Open House

Take-Off with The Blue Angels

The Blue Angels first took off in 1946 when Admiral Chester Nimitz formed the squadron. His goal was to raise awareness of naval aviation and improve morale in the fleet.

Since then, the Blue Angels have thrilled audiences in daring precision flying performances around the world!

In 2015, they welcomed their first female pilot when Marine Capt. Katie Cook stepped into the cockpit.

Every year, approximately 11 million flying fans head to the flight line to watch the Blue Angels take off.

Take Flight with The Thunderbirds

First taking off in 1953, the Thunderbirds were formed to showcase the newly formed US Air Force.

They have featured a female pilot, Major Michelle Curran, since 2019. She is currently returning for her second season with the Thunderbirds.

The Thunderbirds also travel the farthest overseas of US military precision flight squadrons. They have 2020 shows scheduled in Alaska and Ontario.

Will you be seeing a military air show this year? Share your favorite in the comments!

Trips, TDYs and running your kids everywhere. Who has time for getting or staying in shape? You can find sneaky ways to try fitting fitness into your busy military life!

Fitting Fitness into a Busy Military Life

So you don’t have time to get in a full workout at the gym. No sweat! You can find simple ways to add fitness to even the busiest of days in super creative ways.

Make Your Walk Challenging

Park farther away from your office or the store. Take the stairs or go the long way around.

Every step you take is burning extra calories! Over time, those little steps add up.

Working at home or hanging with the kids? Go for a walk around the block a few times every day. Bonus: pushing a stroller or hauling a small human around is a great whole-body workout!

Ready to add a challenge? Up the ante! Try these ideas:

• Walk the stairs a few times
• Find a hill and hike up
• Do lunges for a block, then switch to high knees
• Stop at every crosswalk and do squats
• Pause at benches or hip-height walls to do pushups
• Add in a few spurts at a faster pace, like a brisker walk or a jog

Take 15 Minutes to Sweat

Got 15 minutes? You have time for a quick workout!

Fitness doesn’t have to involve hours of lifting or miles of running. It can be a quick burst of high intensity in small segments.

High-intensity interval training (HIIT) is a growing trend in fitness. HIIT workouts are pretty much what the name implies: short periods of very energetic movements. Think: jumping jacks, jump squats, plank jacks and other similar compound movements.

You can find simple HIIT workouts on YouTube. Having instructional videos to guide you is super helpful to staying on track and getting your sweat on effectively.

Try these channels:

• PopSugar Fitness
• Physical Kitchness (owned by a USMC spouse!)
• Fitness Blender
• The Body Coach TV

All of these channels have workout videos that fit a full-body workout into 20 minutes or less. Best of all, many videos require little to no special equipment!

Workout Where You Are

Running around all day leaves very little time for actual running or lifting or workouts generally. Instead of trying to find a full hour or more to get a workout in, you can add moves into your normal routines.

A great place to workout quickly is the playground. Yes, seriously.

Try these moves:

• Suspended Knee Tucks: place feet into a swing’s seat and balance on your arms; tuck knees to chest while contracting abs
• Bench Jumps: do a box jump-type move, just onto a wide bench or low wall
• Stair Lunges: place one leg onto a play structure stair, then lunge
• Bulgarian Split Squat: facing away from a bench or high stair, prop the toe of one shoe onto the elevated surface and the other leg forward into a lunge position; squat
• Tricep Dips: find a bench, place your hands behind you and then lower your behind off the bench and toward the ground

Do a few of these moves 10-15 times each, 3-4 rounds total. Or for as long as you’re at the playground. Whichever comes first.

By mixing your workout into your normal routine, it’s easy to multi-task! Plus, even if you don’t have kids, chances are good that there’s a playground near you. Even if you just have 15 minutes, you can squeeze in a great full-body workout.

Fit Fitness Into Your Errands

You’ve got lots of things to do, but also need to squeeze in a workout. What do you do?

One option is to run the errands, literally. You could also bike, but it’s not as punny.

Map out the places you need to go:

• Grocery Store
• Post Office
• Bank
• Pet Store

Then pick an option for carrying your items, like a comfortable backpack or bike-bags. Then gear up and go. Hit your must-go spots and break a sweat at the same time!

If you’re trying to juggle errands, workouts and kids, load the kids into a jogging stroller or equip their bike with a decent handlebar basket. Drop your purchases under the stroller or into the bike basket as you burn calories.

Find What Works for You

Fitness can happen, even if you are super busy. All it takes is just a few minutes here and there to do a few moves. Even if you don’t break a total sweat, you’ll still be working muscles and burning calories.

It’s all about creating fitness moments and building a routine that works for your life.

What’s your best tip to fit fitness into your busy military life? Share your ideas in the comments!

Summer PCS season is right around the corner and it is not too early to start to plan even before you receive those ever-elusive orders. I’ve always been super disorganized and looked with awe at my fellow military spouses with their PCS binders and elaborate coding systems for moving boxes. I even know one friend who tapes down the dimensions of a U-Haul truck on her floor and begins packing in plastic crates and loads them in her fake U-Haul until she packs the real one a few days before the move. It is really a genius system if you can be that organized. Here are a few tips for the less organized to help keep your sanity.

• Once you know your next duty station see what your options are for housing on post. If the waiting list is long you will need to consider other options. Rentals which will open for the summer are usually listed after the start of the year. The best ones will go fast. I personally do not like to rent sight unseen. What we typically do as a family is at Spring Break if it is close enough to drive to (about an eight-hour drive) we will go check out the new duty station as a family. If you must fly, my husband will spend spring break with the kids, and I will fly to the new location to check out schools and rental options.
• Important Documents. We don’t use a binder, we keep everything in a fire box and that includes birth certificates, social security cards, marriage certificate, car titles, and passports. You should know where everything is but for the less organized find them and pick a way to keep track of them. I like a firebox because it is difficult to lose.
• Start the PCS Purge. It is not too early to think about what you can get rid of. We have never gone over our weight limit by doing this. Consider getting rid of stuff in those boxes you have shipped every PCS move and never unpacked. Get rid of outgrown clothes and toys. Your local installation Thrift Shop accepts donations and profits are donated as community grants and scholarships. If you start early this doesn’t have to be stressful. I just do one room a week until complete.
• I tend to keep a well-stocked pantry. It is too early to stop grocery shopping, but I like to get an idea of what we have and to start planning to use it up prior to our move.
• Start thinking about how you want to move. We always use movers but a DITY move may be a good option for your family. If you have lots of stuff and especially if it is a cross country move it is just easier to have someone else do the packing and moving. PCS season is super busy so as soon as your spouse has your orders get into transportation to schedule your move. You will have better options and more likely to get the days you want.
• The Fun Part, dreaming about your new duty station and planning your trip. We always take the full amount of travel time authorized by the military and make it a fun trip. I get online and start reconning pet friendly hotels and activities. Having a pet does limit you but we still have managed to make fun trips. The goal is not to arrive at your new duty station exhausted.

I loved all 30 of my moves (yes, it is a lot, but I was a military brat, served 12 years and became a military spouse. Yes, there are challenges, but I love seeing and living in new places. So, take the time to do some pre-planning and a little organizing for a stress free move. What are your favorite PCS tips? Post below to share.

Do you have more children then your GI Bill transfer can fund or maybe want to use it for yourself or your spouse? The Army/Air Guard and Military Reserves can be a great job for your high school senior and help to fund a debt free education.

Active Duty is not the only way to go for military education benefits. The Reserves and National Guard offer a variety of educational benefits that make this a great option for any student but especially average students who may not qualify for any scholarships. Here are some opportunities:

• One Weekend a Month – Do a drill weekend and pick up some extra cash. Enlistments also included access to the commissary, Exchange, and everything MWR offers.
• As a member of the National Guard or Reserves you have access to health care with a low monthly fee.
• Tuition Assistance – Currently you receive 100 percent which is up to $250 per semester hour. You can take up to 18 semester hours for a total of $4,500 per year.
• The Air Force has its own Community College of the Air Force which helps you turn your military education into a degree.
• Many career fields in the military can lead to college credit. Most schools will give you up to four hours in Physical Education credits for boot camp.
• Servicemembers Opportunity Colleges Degree Network System (SOC DNS) – This is a great program which allows you to establish a “home college” which will grant the degree. You must take 25% of your degree credits through the “home college”. The rest of your degree can come from transfer credit from other colleges, military experience and through testing like the CLEP tests.
• CLEP tests – These usually cost $89 each but you can take at the education center for free. This is a great way to earn college credit.
• The Montgomery GI Bill Select Reserve (MGIB-SR) and Post-9/11 GI Bill maybe options available to you and provide money for education.
• Student Loan Repayment – Some fields offer this bonus which helps to pay off your student loans.
• Bonus – Some fields offer bonuses up to $20,000.
• If you join the Army or Air National Guard, check the state that you live in for more benefits. Many states offer free tuition for members of the Guard.
• You can check with a recruiter if your child is really interested and wants to start as soon as possible. There is a Split Option program which allows a Junior in High School to go to Basic Training the summer between their junior and senior year. Once completed they will participate in monthly drills and then complete their training the following summer.

     These are all huge educational benefits which can go a long way to paying for a college education. I think military training also helps with maturity level as well and can lead to a more positive outcome when attending college. What ways have you come up with to help your child pay for college.  

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.WanderWordsWine.com

School can be hard for military kids. The constant moves, always feeling like the new kid and different standards can seriously impact how your MilKid feels about school. Add in deployments or other bumps in the military life road and K-12 school can start to become a mess.

But you can fix your military child’s school year starting right now. In fact, the end of the calendar year is a great time to take stock, look back and plan ahead.

New School, New Challenges: How To Fix-Up Your MilKid’s Year ASAP

Let’s be real: there is no one-size-fits all solution for school issues of any sort. But there are some common themes that run through many struggles and that can impact a majority of military children.

New to School & Feeling Alone

Maybe you’ve just PCSed, moved over the last summer or simply progressed to the next higher level of school. Whatever the case, your child is new. Even with almost 4 months of school under their belt, your child is still not quite feeling connected to the community.

It’s definitely hard to feel like you don’t belong. Here are some options to fix up your MilKid’s school year ASAP:

• Contact the teacher: works best in the lower grades; let them know your concerns
• Work with the school counselor: share your concerns and ask about options
• Extracurriculars: think beyond school-based options and include community-run sports, clubs and organizations
• Therapy: sometimes talking to someone completely separate from school and home can sometimes help uncover issues
• Connect with old friends: set up video chats with friends from previous duty stations; connecting with old friends can help boost confidence to make new friends

Someone is Deploying Soon

A fact of military life is deployment. But just because it’s “normal” doesn’t make it easier.

But you can build out your support team with these tips:

• Share with the teacher: respect OPSEC, but share as much as possible
• Let the admin and counselor know: there might be extra resources available to support your child or family
• Keep communication open: let the teacher and school know about changes with the deployment or your child at home
• Look for changes: dropping grades, changing behavior and social differences can all hint at bigger issues; let the teacher know if you notice these things, ask that the teacher do the same

Getting Ready to PCS Soon

The process of leaving can be hard. Every child acts and reacts differently. Keeping your school and community in the loop can help to make PCSing easier.

Try these tips:

• Reach out to the school counselor: use support groups and resources
• Tell the teacher: ask for contact information for classmates; request recommendation letters, final assessments and one last report card
• Request the cumulative file: talk to the school’s administration or front office; ask for a copy of your child’s permanent record and let then know when and where you’ll be moving
• Create a contact list: plan to keep in touch with friends – set up an email group or other chat group, pre-address envelopes and put video chats on your schedule

Grades Aren’t Looking So Hot

Every child can struggle with grades, regardless of military connections. How you react to lower than expected grades can help your child get back on track.

Try these tips:

• Talk to the Teacher: start by talking to the teacher(s); use email, phone calls or in-person meetings to chat about trouble spots and ways to help
• Ask for resources: there might be extra options in school to help your child succeed, like differentiated assignments, extra tutoring or other small groups for learning
• Keep good data: make a file of your child’s grades, assignments, tests and other work; keep track of where those trouble spots are popping up routinely – use this data when you talk to the teacher
• Get a tutor: free tutoring is available to military families through Tutor.com, but hiring someone to work with your child in-person could be a good option; ask the school for a list of teachers who tutor or reach out to the military community for recommendations
• Request testing: if nothing is working, and you’ve tried a lot of things, you can formally request special education testing to see if your child might qualify for an IEP

You’re Feeling Disconnected & Alone

Maybe everything is going well for your child, but you’re the one feeling out of sorts and lonely. Try these things:

• Join the PTA: yes, it’s another thing to do, but you’ll also get access to their membership rosters – which means contact info for parents in your child’s class
• Find just one: start with one person; reach out to the parents of your child’s best friend or talk to someone at practice on Saturday – it just takes one friend
• Use the military community: hop into the digital community and send a request for a buddy out to the hive mind – someone will respond and you’ll gain a new friend
• Be a joiner: don’t limit your new found love of joining things to the PTA, try other groups like Toast Makers, rotary groups or fitness communities; your new friends might be waiting there

How have you helped your child succeed at school? We’d love to learn from your wisdom!

One of my favorite Christmas gifts one year came from an Aunt on a limited budget. She gave my Mom $25 for the family and my Mom went out and bought all kinds of treats and fun foods that we didn’t normally get to have. $25 went a lot further in those days. With our family eating nutritiously most of the time, this was a special experience my sisters and I loved. Commissary Gift Cards are a great way to gift a food experience to your family and friends that have access to the commissary. It is very special at this time of year as the commissary brings in special holiday treats from around the world.

“We like to say that anyone can show their appreciation and support to military service members and their families around the world by giving them the gift of groceries,” said Army Command Sgt. Maj. Tomeka N. O’Neal, the Defense Commissary Agency’s senior enlisted advisor to the Defense Commissary Agency director. To make the gift even more convenient you can order them online and they can be shipped anywhere in the U.S. or to APO, FPO, and DPO addresses for those OCONUS or you can just pick them up at your local commissary.

“The program, featuring cards in denominations of $25 or $50, has been incredibly successful. Since it began in 2011, over 1 million gift cards have been sold, said Bob Bunch, DeCA’s gift card program manager. “A redemption rate that tops 90 percent shows that it’s a gift that’s not only used but is greatly appreciated. This year we’re making it even more attractive to give gift cards through the rollout of new ‘open value’ cards that let purchasers put any amount between $5 and $300 on them.”

With the new ‘open value” cards, you can determine how much you want to give. Only 40 commissaries can load amounts on the cards. If your commissary is not one of the 40, you can buy them online. Eventually all commissaries will have the capability. You will also be able to purchase in Navy Exchanges with a partnership between NEXCOM and DeCA.

“Separations created by the demands of military service are a tough part of military life,” O’Neal said. “Whether it’s a single service member or a family, using commissary gift cards lifts spirits. The commissary’s quality products and services remind them of home and they can save their money to use on other things to make their holidays memorable

Commissary Gift Card Facts

• Gift cards are available online and at all commissaries worldwide.
• Cards are good for five years from the date of purchase.
• Cards purchased online incur a shipping and handling fee. There are no fees when the card is purchased in a store.
• There is no limit to the number of gift cards that a purchaser can buy. It’s recommended that organizations and activities consider buying their gift cards online if they plan to purchase more than 50 cards at a time.
• Cards can be shipped anywhere in the United States. When shipping outside the United States, an APO, FPO or DPO address must be used.
• To check a gift card’s balance, go online and then click the “Check your balance” box.
• There’s a phone number, 877-988-4438, on the back of the gift cards that can handle customer service questions. Customers can also use this number to check the balance on their card.

The 40 Commissaries that carry the new Open Gift Card

• Virginia: Fort Eustis, Langley Air Force Base, Fort Lee, Fort Myer, Norfolk Naval Shipyard Scott Center Annex, Joint Expeditionary Base Little Creek, Naval Base Norfolk, Fort Belvoir, Marine Corps Base Quantico, Naval Air Station Oceana, Naval Surface Warfare Center Dahlgren.
• Maryland: Fort Detrick, Aberdeen Proving Ground, Dover Air Force Base, Naval Air Station Patuxent River, Joint Base Andrews, Naval Support Activity Annapolis, Forest Glen, Fort Meade
• Connecticut: Submarine Base New London
• Maine: Bangor Air National Guard Base
• New Jersey: Picatinny Arsenal, Lakehurst and McGuire Commissaries at Joint Base McGuire-Dix-Lakehurst
• Pennsylvania: Carlisle Barracks, Tobyhanna Army Depot
• New York: Mitchel Field, Saratoga Springs, Fort Drum, U.S. Military Academy (West Point), Fort Hamilton
• North Carolina: Marine Corps Air Station New River, Marine Corps Base Camp Lejeune
• Massachusetts: Hanscom Air Force Base
• Washington, D.C.: Joint Base Anacostia-Bolling
• Rhode Island: Naval Education and Training Center Newport
• South Carolina: Fort Jackson, Naval Weapons Station Charleston and Charleston Air Force Base at Joint Base Charleston, Shaw Air Force Base

For more information visit more time and money by visiting the online customer portal, My Commissary).

Marguerite Cleveland is a freelance writer who specializes in human interest and travel stories. She is a military brat, a veteran and now a military spouse.  Her military experience is vast as the daughter of a Navy man who served as an enlisted sailor and then Naval Officer. She served as an enlisted soldier in the reserves and on active duty, then as an Army Officer. She currently serves as a military spouse. She lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and two sons. Visit her website www.WanderWordsWine.com

Prepping a care package to send to a military-connected loved one this holiday season? As of right now, it’s officially go time! You’ll need to hustle to get your presents and cards ready in order to make the holiday shipping deadline.

Hustle to Make the 2019 Holiday Shipping Deadline

Run, don’t walk, to your closest USPS location to drop your parcels and envelopes so that they arrive in time for the holidays!

CONUS Holiday Shipping Deadlines

You have a little more wiggle room if you’re sending mail within the lower 48 US states.

• Retail Ground: December 14
• First Class: December 20
• Priority: December 21
• Priority Express: December 23

Just because you have a smidge longer to procrastinate doesn’t mean that you should hold off on sending your items. It’s better to be on the early side to ensure your packages arrive on time.

Alaska & Hawaii USPS Deadlines

If you’re sending things to Hawaii, you’re going to want to watch these dates:

• First Class: December 18
• Priority: December 19
• Priority Express: December 21

Alaska-bound mail has similar deadlines for their Christmas delivery:

• First Class: December 19
• Priority: December 19
• Priority Express: December 21

APO/FPO/DPO AE Zip 090-092 Mail Deadlines

Everything needs to be shipped, completely, by December 18. But that’s the most expensive option. If you’re looking to save some money, watch these dates:

• Retail Ground: November 6
• Space Available: November 27
• Parcel Airlift: December 4
• First Class and Priority Mail: December 11
• Priority Express Military: December 18

APO/FPO/DPO AE Zip 093 Holiday Shipping Deadlines

If you’re mailing to or from an AE zip code that begins with 093, you’ll want to mark these dates:

• Retail Ground: November 6
• Space Available: November 27
• Parcel Airlift: December 4
• First Class and Priority Mail: December 9
• Priority Express Military: None

APO/FPO/DPO AE Zip 094-099 Holiday Mail Deadlines

Like our first group of zip codes in OCONUS military locations, sending mail to or from AE FPO/APO/DPO addresses with zip codes beginning with 094-099 should watch these dates:

• Retail Ground: November 6
• Space Available: November 27
• Parcel Airlift: December 4
• First Class and Priority Mail: December 11
• Priority Express Military: December 18

APO/FPO/DPO AE Zip 340 Mail Deadlines

Everything sent to or from AE zips starting with 340 needs to be mailed by December 18 in order to ensure arrival before December 25. Keep these dates in mind when you’re planning:

• Retail Ground: November 6
• Space Available: November 27
• Parcel Airlift: December 4
• First Class and Priority Mail: December 11
• Priority Express Military: December 18

APO/FPO/DPO AP Zip 962-966 Mailing Deadlines

For packages, letters and cards headed to the Asian-Pacific region, everything will need to be posted by December 18. Mark these dates to ensure arrival by Christmas:

• Retail Ground: November 6
• Space Available: November 27
• Parcel Airlift: December 4
• First Class and Priority Mail: December 11
• Priority Express Military: December 18

Check It Twice & Pack It Nice

Always confirm shipping deadlines with your local military of civilian USPS locations. If these dates don’t work for you, it can pay to check with other shipping services, like UPS and FedEx. However, you may pay a premium for their shipping options.

When packing holiday packages, ensure that there are no prohibited items, like alcohol and drugs. For mail headed OCONUS, check the shipping restrictions for your intended recipient’s location.

For international mail, even if it’s being sent to or from a military post office, it’s important to complete a US customs form. There is a quick short-form option that’s easier to fill out. Pick up a few at your local USPS office. Make sure the form is filled out correctly and all information is accurate.

When packing items, take care with potentially fragile things. Adding some extra padding or using bubble wrap can help to ensure a break-free delivery! It’s also helpful to pack really breakable items so that they are surrounded by other items that can provide cushioning in the event of a drop or hard bump. Shipping can be rough!

For food gifts, double-check the expiration date on pre-packaged items. If you’re sending a special batch of homemade goodies, stick to dry and dense items, like biscotti, or use tried-and-true recipes, like canning jar cake.

Pro tip: don’t pack food items in with other non-food items, especially scented things. Smells can mingle and change during shipping due to proximity and varying external conditions, like temperature, altitude and humidity. When in doubt, pack things separately!

No matter what you are sending or where it is headed, be sure to secure all boxes prior to shipping. Use packing tape to really seal all edges and prevent the box from breaking apart in transit.

Add a clearly written address label to the box or envelope and you’re ready to send!

What is your favorite gift to mail to military loved ones for the holidays? We’d love to learn from your ideas!